Story of a chronic marijuana smoker

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I’ve been a chronic daily smoker on and off for the best part of 15 years. Semi-successfully given up plenty of times, only to slide back into it as soon as the chance presented itself. This time is different, I’ve also given up drinking and cigarettes and slowly started adding in healthier habits and routines (lot’s of work still to go). One of the things that have helped me a lot is a really simple App called “Habits” where you can tick each day completing the action of a new habit off.

My first “Habit” was Tree Free, I then added No alcohol and cigarettes a week later. This week I’ve added “read a book” and “Exercise”. Once I’ve got a few weeks of these nailed I’ll add a sleep routine and “Write something”. The first two weeks have been a real struggle and a case of not doing my three core vices at all costs, not socializing, struggling to get out of bed, mood swings terrible sleep, etc.

I still miss it greatly and have to battle not to relapse but am starting to gain some of the benefits, financially, emotionally and physically. I’m less depressed and anxious but with a wider range of emotions. The area I’ve really struggled with is the loss of friendships and social isolation that cutting out this huge part of my life has caused, but I plan to change this through new hobbies, just difficult as I’m the guy who gets naturally connects with stoners and usually found sober types a bit boring.

Anyway, for those still sober this decade, keep it up, it’s a streak that you won’t be able to start for over 9 years and when people ask it’s pretty awesome to be able to say that I stopped that last decade.

Giving up a 10-year marijuana addiction that almost ended my life

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My bong, buster, all my bud, papers, everything. I did this once before, back in July, and only lasted a couple of weeks. The problem is that I’m in Canada and it’s so easy for me to walk in the liquor store and get pre-rolls and packaged buds.

Yesterday morning, I woke up with a full plate of things to do. Instead, I decided to wake and bake. This has been a trend for a couple years now, to the point that I have no social life anymore, and barely even know my friends.

I’m so sick of feeling the dependency of something external. I’m sick of having to smoke before I eat. Before I play video games. Before I go to bed. Before I start my day. Luckily I never got high before work, but the second work was over I would get high. I’m sick of feeling the haze all the time. Not being able to concentrate 100% on the task at hand.

I’m sick of having great ideas and lofty plans only for me to procrastinate and smoke instead. Or wake up the next day and not want to do anything because the post-high shit feeling the next day makes me so lazy.

I hate how when I’m on weed I feel like I don’t want to do it anymore, but when I’m sober I crave it so bad. I need to prove to myself that I have more self-control than this and that I have control over my own life.

I just needed to get all of this out before I explode. Here’s to last more than 2 weeks this time.